The Alchemist Heady Topper

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Call me Ishmael. I dare you. We are back with a vengeance, and oh, how we have missed you! If one is to make a comeback after a two-month absence, one might as well go big or go home. It doesn't get much bigger than this, right? Tonight we bring you the esteemed, the highly sought, the deservedly highly rated Heady Topper from the Alchemist in Vermont. This beer has been called the best beer in the world. The world!

If you aren't familiar with Heady Topper, it is a double IPA made in Waterbury, Vermont. Currently The Alchemist is undergoing an expansion, so this beer is even harder than normal to obtain. It is distributed according to a very strict release schedule in Vermont only, and most places sell out of Heady within hours. No, we haven't been to Vermont lately. A pilot friend picked some up on a recent trip there and was kind enough to share it with me. It comes in a 16-ounce can, and you are encouraged to drink it straight from the can, which I fully intend to do. I did pour a little out for photographic purposes, just for you and well, because its color is utterly gorgeous.

We have talked about it long enough. I need this in my life right now, so let's just get to it. The color of this is the most beautiful pale color I have seen in a DIPA. It pours a beautiful pale orange with a little chill haze when you pour it straight from the fridge. As mine has warmed while typing this so far, it has developed into a gorgeous pale straw color that is pretty translucent. If I didn't know what I was about to drink, I would guess a pilsner (and oh, how delightfully wrong I would be!). Confession: this isn't my first Heady Topper. Oops. Sorry. There was a finger or so of fluffy white head atop this as I poured a bit, but it dissipated immediately. The aroma on this is amazing (OK, that's another reason I poured a little bit into a glass, so that I could get a better idea of the aroma). Mango, papaya, passionfruit, grapefruit, a hint of pine all waft past my nose and lure said schnozz into the beer. I've licked worse things off my nose. Taking a sip, each of those are present in the taste, along with a lovely light cracker note that serves as a reminder that this is no session IPA. This is a wonderfully complex IPA, with each sip delivering a different layer of delight. The exotic fruits, the citrus, the pine, the utter deliciousness all come in waves across the tongue. There is very little, if any, perceived bitterness, not at all what many averse to IPAs would expect. It's also not overly sweet, like so many DIPAs tend to be. The body on this is perfectly balanced, not too heavy, not too light. This tastes like superior craftsmanship in every sip. This might be the best DIPA I have ever had.

When we first had the opportunity to have this, we put it next to Fat Head's Hop Juju and Bell's Hopslam, my favorite beer. Heady Topper was head and shoulders above both. We recently brewed a DIPA for a competition, and I shot the moon on it. I wanted it to be better than Pliny the Elder or Heady. I think it's better than Pliny, and we will see how it stands up to Heady. I don't expect it to be quite as good as Heady, but we will see.

5/5 caps

-Jennie

As Jennie eloquently said, WE'RE BACK BABY! To let you loyal readers know what has been happening, well, Porn Maker 5000 (former computer) totally shit on us. We've been looking for a computer that screams out to us, but nothing has yet. We're temporarily borrowing our neighbors' XP-based computer, trying not to use it too much (only things we've downloaded have been 3-4 pictures, OpenOffice and Google Chrome browser). Not our computer, not ours to put 4 ½ months of music on. Countless hours of work and homebrewing has consumed our time.

Enough about us, you don't care about our banter. You care about the beer and what our opinions are on it.

I pulled this out of the fridge about 10 minutes ago to let it warm up. I, too, am going to drink straight from the can on this. I'm also doing a palate cleanser of Burger after an IPA, a hoppy red ale and dinner of corned beef.

Why drink from the can? Well, the giant letters at the top of the can tell you to. What else does the can tell you?

“Heady Topper is an American Double India Pale Ale. This beer is not intended to be the biggest or most bitter. It is meant to give you wave after wave of hoppy goodness on your palate. Tremendous amounts of American hops will creep up on you, and leave you with a dense hoppy finish in your mouth.

So drinkable, it's scary.

Sometimes I wish I could crawl right into the can. Freshness and control have always been my main concern when it comes to our beer. We are committed to providing you with an unfiltered and unpasteurized hop experience.

Why do I recommend that you drink it from the can?

Quite simply, to ensure a delightful, hop experience. The act of pouring it in a glass smells nice, but it releases the essential hop aromas that we have worked so hard to retain. If you MUST pour it into a glass, you may find that some of the hop resins have settled to the bottom- leave them in the can while pouring. This beer is perishable, and at its best when it is young, fresh and hazy.

Keep it cold, but not ice cold.

Drink this beer immediately, we are always making more.

John Kimmich

The Alchemist

Waterbury, Vermont

DON'T BE A D-BAG, RECYCLE THIS CAN!”

Yes. I enjoy reading the text on bottles and cans. I picked up this habit from the delightfully humorous text on the labels of Flying Dog (but if I delve deep into my psyche, it probably stems from reading the 'flavor text' at the bottom of Magic: The Gathering cards. Yes, I enjoyed the game, don't judge).

Ok, that killed time and allowed this to warm up. As I crack it open, I'm entranced by citrus, tropical fruit, and faint hints of pine in my olfactory senses while my auditory senses are being blasted by Frank Turner's “I Am Disappeared” through the ear buds. We are electric pulses, yes indeed, Frank, but right now, my nose feels like it was just plugged into a light socket. The enjoyable onslaught of hop aroma makes me forget all of life's worries. WHY IS THERE NOT A CANDLE THAT SMELLS LIKE THIS?!?!?!?!

As this gently slides down my throat (HA! That's what she said), the hop oils start taking a stranglehold on my tongue, pummeling it with a fantastic array of tropical fruit (mango, passionfruit, faint lychee), grapefruit and a tinge of pine. This isn't bitter in the least, no, my friend; just fantastic flavors blasting your taste buds and coating your tongue in a awesome resin. The resin leaves a slight stickiness, reminding you your tongue was just Hiroshima'd with hops. The alcohol of 8% really isn't noticed while sipping on this delectable brew. Holy Hopsus. This is fan-fucking-tastic.

5/5 caps

-Nathan-

Food pairing: Corned beef (biff as my dude J-Doles calls it). And cabbage, bitches. Because we're Irish-American and Jennie can't wait until Tuesday.

Music pairing: Cherubs singing

Cheese pairing: Mango habanero cheddar

Destihl Hoperation Overload

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We picked this up on the way back to Ohio after The Phil's memorial service in Peoria, Illinois. It's been a rough year with deaths, for most people I know, but we have the solution, ladies and gentlemen. Craft Beer helps take away some pain.

We were mixing 6 packs and decided to get a 4 or 6 pack of an IPA to drink/later review once we completed the long 7 hour drive back to Columbus, Ohio. We stumbled upon this, a local to Illinois brew, not far from Peoria. We were intrigued by the sign at Friar Tucks saying it won bronze in the World Beer Championship. Ok, beer, Ohio bound you are.

9.6 % ABV, 85 IBUs seemed like the perfect treat around midnight after a 7 hour drive across 3 states. It's been many beers ago (and much turmoil), so let's see how it stacks up now.

This pours reddish-orange with about 2-fingers of off-white head that dissipates quickly, leaving wonderful lacing in its wake. The aroma on this has sweet, caramel, citrus and almost banana notes. The initial sip- a punch to the face of boozy notes and astringency that leaves your taste buds paralyzed momentarily. The second sip- Ah, there's flavor. Big malty (caramel mostly with some biscuit) take the forefront while the hops slowly build up. Orange, earthy, and grapefruit start and then that banana pops in. On the back end there is pine and a weird tartness until the bitterness builds to mouth puckering stickiness. Medium mouthfeel for a 9.6% brew.

3.6/5 caps

-Nathan-

I remember finding this at Friar Tucks and being excited that there was a brewery in a nearby town (Bloomington, IL) that was putting out good beer. I then remember drinking it when we got back and being a little disappointed. Then again, that entire trip was pretty much a downer, other than getting to spend time with some of my favorite people on the planet.

This poured quite foamy and as Nathan mentioned, the head dissipated quite quickly. It is a clear medium amber color. The aroma on this is caramel, mild pine and grapefruit, and on the third sniff, I finally picked up the faint banana that my beertner discovered. The flavor is... a bit odd. A rather balanced double IPA, with the requisite sweetness and not as many hops as I would like to taste. Yet it is bitter, and the banana sort of underpins the entire taste with the citrus, pine, and grapefruit kind of floating above it. It's almost like they open fermented or at least fermented it at too warm a temperature. This being a can, I'm not sure that that would ever work itself out. It's not bad, don't get me wrong. It's more balanced than I prefer for a DIPA, and I find the banana note a little off-putting. It's really sweet, yet the hops come in to attempt to balance it out, but somehow kind of miss the mark. It's sticky sweet on the tongue and medium-bodied.

All in all, a little disappointing, but from what I've read, DeStihl produces many other great brews. I look forward to trying something different when we are back in Illinois. 

3.5/5 caps

-Jennie

Food Pairing: An Italian beef with spicy giardinera
Music Pairing: "Paralysis" by Scott Weiland
Cheese Pairing: Smoked provolone

Revolution Unsessionable

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This little beauty made an appearance on the Columbus beer scene this week, and it flew off the shelves. It was originally released in September, apparently, and has been a very popular beer from Revolution Brewing, who claims it is the biggest beer they have ever brewed, and their first specialty beer to be canned. If you will recall, we love what Revolution is doing. Anti-Hero is one of our favorite go-to IPAs. We recently fell in love with the movie Drinking Buddies, which is set at Revolution Brewing. I was raised not far from Chicago, and I love the city. I am thrilled that Revolution is doing so well, although next time, would it be too much to ask for a Giordano's pizza delivered with my six-pack? Goodthanks.

This 10% ABV, 100IBU behemoth pours a medium golden color. There was a pretty good amount of white head as I poured it, but it quickly dissipated. The aroma on this just made me sigh with pleasure... notes of grapefruit, pine, lychee, passionfruit, and light crackery notes floated past my nose. Taking a sip, the taste is not quite as bold as I expected from the aroma. This beer does not punch you in the taste buds, but instead, quietly invades them. The same flavors are in the taste as the aroma, but it is really sweet, and there is also a grassy note that I am getting in the flavor that I did not notice in the aroma. Fortunately, it is not excessively cloying in sweetness; I have really come to dislike IIPA's that are too sweet and clash malts with hops. In this beer, the sweetness just underlies the beer, complementing the hop flavors and aromas so nicely instead of overpowering them. It is well-carbonated and leaves sticky hop residue in the mouth.

This is Anti-Hero's fantastic big brother. Apparently, it was only brewed once, but let's hope that vigorous sales and demand turn this into a seasonal offering from Revolution. Now, about that pizza...

4.8/5 caps

-Jennie

Blah blah blah my random banter that I'm sure no one really reads. Fuck this, let's just get straight to the beer. I needed to get this, as it's the talk of Columbus right now.

I, unlike Jennie, am enjoying mine straight from can. As soon as I crack open the can, my olfactory senses are overwhelmed with pine and grass, with initial hints of grapefruit and lychee that come out more with each sniff. The aroma is worthy of noting the old "they should make a candle that smells like this".... Now, exactly who 'they' are has never been determined, so instead of trying to figure out who 'they' are, I will let this 10%, 100 IBU behemoth slither past my lips, hoping the bliss obtained in the aroma is equally as gratifying in the taste. Well fuck... it is. Big hop flavors that onslaught the taste buds, wrecking them with grapefruit, lychee, pine and some earthy notes. Eventually, there is some light malt flavor, but it fades quickly as the hops continue marching their way across your tongue, changing the flavor profile once again to bitter with grapefruit and orange zest. Shock of shocks, it's a nice bitter finish, but this drinks smoother than any other 10% beer I've had. It's abusive on the taste buds, but has the body and carbonation of a 6% IPA. This is fantastic.

We have 4 more cans of this, one of which will be spoken for. What to do with 3 more of these? Hmmm...

4.85/5 caps

-Nathan-

Food pairing: A spinach and cheese pie from Giordano's. Seriously. Please send one.
Cheese pairing: Provel
Music pairing: Rise Against, "Savior"

Dark Horse Double Crooked Tree

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Ahhhh, Wednesday. I've been talking beer all day because I recently started working at my local homebrew supply store. And today, when one of the pioneers of the craft beer scene in Columbus walked into the store, I almost gushed with fangirl-esque excitement. I don't get overly excited when I meet celebrities, but brewers, on the other hand, I tend to clam up and think of them as rock stars to my liver. Hooray for beer! Let's drink some!


Tonight we are drinking Dark Horse's Double Crooked Tree. It's a double IPA from our friends in Marshall, Michigan. Sure, they got famous with their show on the History channel, "Dark Horse Nation". Congratulations, guys, you worked hard for it and make great beer. I can't wait to see the second half of the season. They recently changed their Double Crooked Tree so that they could distribute to Ohio (I can only assume), because it changed from 13.5% ABV to 12%, which is the current cap in Ohio. Other than that, it is the same recipe as Crooked Tree, only with double the malts and hops. It is released once a year, in February. As you look at the calendar and realize that it is now October, I'm sure many of you are screaming "heresy!" at your monitor right now. I was a tad worried when I sat down to review this, but at 12%, it's going to hold up just fine. Even Dark Horse says so.

This pours a deep amber color with some chill haze and a small collar of off-white head. The aroma is tantalizing: deep caramel, soft citrus, a hint of pine, and a whole lot of booziness assault the nose. Yes, some of the hops have died off as I take a sip, but it's still really rather enjoyable, better than most DIPAs past their hop peak. There are brighter citrus, some grapefruit, and a touch of earthiness that complement the notes from the aroma. And then, wham! The boozy back side lashes your tongue. This DIPA is a beast! A flavorful, delicious beast. This is the kind of beer that can make you go from 0 to 60 in no time flat. It is moderately carbonated and not nearly as sticky as I would expect.

Come February, do yourself a favor and pick up a couple of bottles. One for drinking right away, and one (or more) for aging.

4.6/5 caps

-Jennie

 As my partner mentioned, we're in Columbus, Ohio, so is the artist who does the artwork for Dark Horse. W. Ralph Walters does amazing work, you should check his stuff out. He also did the artwork on a local building here, Actual Roastery (which is associated with our friends at Actual Brewing).

(note: picture is from W. Ralph Walters' Facebook page)

With a little shout out to a fantastic artist, I raise this and gaze upon the gorgeous dark amber with faint layer of off-white head. The aroma is caramel heavy with hints of spice and pine at this point (this has been breathing for nearly 2 hours between Jennie's portion, chilling with our awesome neighbor and watching "Franklin and Bash"). The first sip of this is caramel and boozy, with some faint citrus and pine that grows with each second. The second sip gives off more of the hoppy notes, transferring the boozy notes to the back end. The third is just like the second. So, this is roughly 8 months old. Still great. Big malty backbone with the nice hops to give perfect harmony. Short and sweet, sort of like this pour was, as we shared the last 12 ounce bottle of the 4 pack we purchased, the previous 3 were enjoyed day of purchase by Jennie, her dad Phil, and myself. Speaking of Phil, I feel for Aaron from Dark Horse. He recently lost his father and sister-in-law. We've had a number of losses this year: good friends, mentors and Jennie's father. 2014 can suck it...

4.7/5 caps

-Nathan-

Food pairing: A good gyro from a family ran shop
Cheese pairing: Feta (goes great with gyros)
Music pairing:  "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" by A.C. (vulgar band name, great noise metal cover)

Brooklyn Blast!

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How else to make a solid case of the Mondays go away than to drink from our stockpile of good beer? Actually, my Mondays aren't too bad... I get some peace while the child is at school and Nathan is at work, get stuff done around the house, and get in a good run. For the most part, I can't complain about Mondays. But they are still a great excuse to drink beer, don't you agree? Mean Girls is playing in the background while Nathan packages a metric fuckton of beer for an epic beer trade. Actually, this is a pretty great night.

I actually really enjoy Brooklyn's beers, despite us only having reviewed two of them to date. They produce consistently solid brews, right down to their lager. This is their "big" IPA offering, which is brewed with both American and English hops because New York City is halfway between the Pacific Northwest and England. Interesting concept.  Coming in at 8.4%, this recently went from being a seasonal brew to being offered year-round.

This pours a beautiful medium golden orange color with a finger or so of white head. The aroma on this is caramel and citrus with some almost grassy notes to round it out. There is also a bang of pineapple in the nose. Taking a sip, it's almost all caramel and it's very malt-forward. The grassy and pineapple notes really come through in the taste, as well as some vague lemon and orange. It is a very well-balanced "big" IPA without a ton of hop bitterness, yet it's not overly sweet. The mouthfeel is well-carbonated and not too sticky.

Overall, I can't decide whether I like this a lot or not. It has been well-documented that I adore hops. But I can also applaud the use of milder English hops to balance out the palate-killers that are most of those from the Pacific Northwest. It's good, but of course, I would prefer it to be a showcase of the hops.

4/5 caps

-Jennie

While Jennie had a mellow day, my day was chaotic and another example of why I need to get out of shipping. For 7 years, I've wasted my life in this position, only to be bombarded at home with packaging 15 twelve-ounce bottles, a sixteen-ounce can, a twelve-ounce can, and 5 twenty-two- ounce bottles thoroughly to survive the long journey of private courier from Columbus, Ohio to Iowa. 39 pounds of beer and packaging, the packaging that represents pain and agony of work. Sigh. At least there's one reward, good beer.

As this has had time to warm up some, there's still a little bit of white head lingering on this golden orange nectar. This has an aroma, at this point, of fresh cut grass, slight caramel with faint hints of citrus and tropical fruits. As I swirl it (FUCK! I'm officially a beer snob!), the caramel comes out more and the other aromas dissipate. The first sip is caramel heavy with some malty stickiness up front, the hops come in about 2-3 seconds later, lending pineapple and citrus flavors. The stickiness fades after the hops come in, and this finishes slightly juicy.

As I listen to the happy bubbling of the fermenting bucket (a soon to be 11%+ ABV Count Chocula Stout), I reflect on the flavor profile of the Blast! It's not the hop bomb I typically adore, but it's not bad. I would happily turn non-IPA drinkers onto this to get them turn to the Hop Side. By the way, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Hopsus? The 8.4% ABV on this isn't noticed initially, but with each sip, a nice warming sensation comes over you as the constant 'blub blub blub' of the airlock is pounding in your ear, much like the Tell-Tale Heart. Blub blub, blub blub.... I seem to be rambling and apparently as this warms ups, it still has the same flavor profiles that Jennie noticed when this was cold.

4.1/5 caps

-Nathan-

Cheese pairing: Double Gloucester
Food pairing: Chicken vindaloo
Music pairing: Beastie Boys, "No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn"

Staas Brewing 2x IPA

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Have you ever had one of those weekends where you determine that your liver is evil and must be punished? That was us last weekend. Between game days Saturday, Nathan's sort-of reunion Saturday night, and the beer festival Sunday, our livers are still revolting against us. The best part of the weekend was that, while I was at home watching "Brave" with my kiddo, Nathan went to his quasi-reunion (I'll let him explain that one further) in Delaware, about a half hour north of here. We have followed with interest the opening of Delaware's only current brewery and their subsequent first year and change of success. Alas, this is my first time trying their beer, as we just haven't made it to Delaware as often as we would like.

Staas was started by a husband and wife team who had a great passion for homebrewing. They sold their house in Columbus and risked everything -- their life savings, the kindness and graciousness of family and friends, their street cred as homebrewers, etc. -- on opening a brewery in Delaware. Theirs is a story I love. Staas has grown quite a bit of the year-plus they have been open, and they have branched away from the more comfortable styles (they currently have a cinnamon basil saison on tap, and they do a juniper ale that sounds fantastic). Also, if you are looking to alleviate some fog on a Sunday morning, you can head over to Mingo Park around 11:00 and play flag football with the brew crew.

I sent Nathan off with a growler Saturday. He showed up at home with their 2x IPA, which was well sealed with, wait for it, bacon tape. It hands down wins for packaging alone. Also, it should be noted that they do fill other establishments' growlers. OK, enough rambling, I'm dying to try this beer.

The 2x IPA pours a deep amber color that is opaque fresh out of the fridge. After my loquaciousness above, some of the chill haze has abated, but it's still more cloudy than translucent. Even after nearly three days in the fridge, there is still a collar of off-white head sitting atop the beer. (Note: Kyle from Barley's mentioned over the weekend that a well-sealed growler will keep in the fridge for 60 days without compromising the beer. That was a first for me, but good information for times like these.) The aroma on this is rather faint, but I pick up notes of orange, toffee, caramel, grapefruit, and pine. Taking a sip, I pick up on citrus, caramel, earthiness from Cascade hops, and that all fades out to a slightly boozy finish of almost macerated oranges and perhaps a bite of peppercorn. Occasionally the faintest hint of lychee will make an appearance, but not nearly often enough for my taste (that is a purely personal preference). This clocks in at 8.7% ABV, so I'm a bit surprised at the bite from the alcohol; most 10% DIPAs don't taste of this much booze. The mouthfeel on this is well-rounded and a bit sticky, which is not unexpected from a brew with this alcohol content. Overall, I'm a tad disappointed. I was hoping for a hop bomb, and this is more of a well-balanced malty DIPA with acceptable hop presence, but nearly enough for my liking.

4/5 caps

-Jennie

So, as Jennie mentioned, this was a liver wrecking weekend. 15 solid hours of drinking on Saturday in 2 different counties proved to not fare well the following day. But in this 15 solid hours of drinking, there was a stop off at Staas. The quasi-ten-year-reunion was at a bar in Downtown Delaware, a block away from Staas. I'd prefer not to talk about some of the shenanigans that were had, in order to save the guilty parties any shame or agony, but let's get to Staas. It's a small place that, if memory serves, was a small law office, across the street from the funeral home. The joys of a small town, eh?

Regardless, after some drinking and football at home, and drinking and shooting pool at another bar, it was time for drinking and in-depth conversation. My friend has been going to Staas nearly every Friday for a year. She hyped up the place to where instead of a 'destination spot i already wanted to hit', it became a 'this is going to fucking happen'...

As I said earlier, Staas is a small place. A few tables, a bar and a game room; maybe seating for 40-50 people. There's a little gated-off patio out front where about another dozen can sit and enjoy their night, pairing their vices of libations and smoking cigarettes or cigars (as Ohio has a statewide ban of smoking in bars, well, any public building). They have some amazing woodwork that was done by the owners, a gorgeous stained glass window, and about 10 beers on tap at any given time. With them being a small brewery, when they blow a keg of somethings, there's no guarantee they have another keg of the same variety in the back (according to said friend who frequents the venue).

So here we are, Tuesday night. (well technically Wednesday morning now). We have a couple of friends over, sharing emotionally scarring moments that happened last summer... fuck... now I drink. I remember this was mentioned as being 9.4% on the wall, but I could be confusing this with one of their other high test beers (I had a flight of their DIPA, Cinnamon Basil Saison, Oktoberfest, and Belgian Golden before ordering their Pale Ale. The Belgian Golden and DIPA were high test). So I now sit down an actually give a full review of this. While sitting there at Staas, I gave it a 5 star rating on Untappd, with a caption of "Getting a growler.... this is gooooooooood"... So, that was on a day where my senses were dulled from copious amounts of alcohol. As of now, this has a rich amber color. The aroma is toffee and caramel heavy with some faint citrus and tropical notes. The flavor is interesting. it's a nice, balanced DIPA. It has the malt flavors you picked up in the nose, then there's some orange and grapefruit that pop in. There's some bitterness that makes an appearance toward the back as the previously mentioned flavors fade and some light tropical fruit notes come through. There are some earthy tones that show up randomly throughout. The finish on this is slightly sweet with a faint stickiness to it, like a Sugar Daddy (yeah, you remember those?)... Well, not that sweet, but, damn, I want a Sugar Daddy... or Sugar Babies...

There's also a booziness about it that makes you realize that as you're typing, you're not really sure if your typical modified stream-of-conscious meets Gonzo-style writing will work for this review. You start realizing with each sip, there's a growing disdain toward home improvement shows. Sweet merciful Jesus, this has a good amount of alcohol, which makes it worth the $23 growler fill. Jennie initially thought that was a lot for a growler, but doing math this morning in a sleepy state, I realized that at Staas, drinking per pour, it would cost between $32 and $37 for the same amount of ounces you'd get in a 64 ounce growler (only because I can't remember the price per pour). You also feel the sense that you're starting to ramble and should end this before things end poorly for all parties involved. This is a different rating than when my palate was wrecked. It's good, I want to try their beers when I haven't been drinking heavily all day (to get a full profile of each). I will be returning to Staas, and hopefully here soon.

4.2/5 caps

-Nathan-



Music pairing: Green Day, "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)"
Cheese pairing: Dill Havarti
Food pairing: Chile Rellenos

Victory Dirt Wolf

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After a frustrating day at work, I feel like some self punishment is in order. That's right, I'm punishing my taste buds with copious amounts of hops. Upon first look of this, I was turned off. I figured the name indicated it would have a lot of earthy characteristics about it. But, as the old saying goes, you can never judge a book by its cover. Speaking of cover, let's delve into this, nose first and cover this beer (like I want my tongue constantly covered in hops).

This pours a slightly hazy golden orange color with about a finger worth of white head. The aroma on this is slightly caramel with growing notes of citrus, tropical fruits, and straw. Nothing 'dirty' smelling about this. Huh. Ok, let's now hunt down the flavor profile of this 8.7% ABV animal. This enters the lips with a light straw and caramel malt background that lends itself perfectly to the aggressive hop flavors that kick through your teeth, ripping and shredding your mouth with powerful grapefruit, citrus, pine and tropical fruit flavors. After the initial attack, your mouth is reeling in shock with a slight stickiness from the hops. The hop flavor doesn't stick around long, but enough to make its presence known. The alcohol really isn't noticed while drinking, but it does start to sneak up on you, typical wolf, always hunting, always on the prowl for an unsuspecting victim. Tonight, I am the victim of the wolf, and I'm proud to be one.

4.75/5 caps

-Nathan-

Confession: we purchased this awhile ago, and drank the other two beers of the four-pack. I thoroughly enjoyed it then, and am looking forward to assaulting my taste buds once again, in a really good way. I also poured my portion into a tulip glass, respecting the proper glassware movement.

My bottle poured without a trace of haze. Nathan nailed the appearance, other than that. (My bottle also sat in the refrigerator a little longer, while he typed his portion. Reverse chill haze?) He perfectly described the aroma and flavors, so I'll just add that I love the grapefruit-forward nature of this beer; it almost tastes like there is grapefruit zest in this. There is a lovely blast of it toward the back end, and it's oh-so-welcome.

[I've now let this warm a bit to take a long break to visit with neighbors and friends and to watch Franklin and Bash, my favorite legal-beagle show of all time... so let's just get back into this and see how it's warmed.]

After warming for over an hour, it's a little sweeter up front, but again, not offensively sweet. It's just letting you know it's an 8.7% beer. The grapefruit-zest sensation still packs a punch at the back end, just as Stanton Infeld was sucker punched in F&B tonight. There's also a boozy warmth that comes through at the end of this that just warms the soul. Hands down, this is my favorite beer from Victory. It has also rapidly ascended my list of favorite DIPAs and I have repeatedly found myself craving it since those early beers.

4.75/5 caps

-Jennie

Music Pairing: "Hungry Like the Wolf" by Duran Duran
Cheese Pairing: A naturally smoked provolone
Food Pairing: A Philly cheesesteak, and not only because this is made near Philadelphia

Three Floyds Apocalypse Cow

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With just less than an hour before "Drunk History" starts, we figured we might try to match the storytellers on this fabulous show. I so want to pressure Derek Waters into drinking our way through as many 12% beers as it takes for me to fall onto the floor and sing the opening of the Lion King. Not too long ago on a venture to our favorite local craft beer store, we picked up a bomber of this Three Floyds seasonal brew. It's a double IPA with lactose milk sugars added. It sounds just weird enough to try, gonzo enough to love, and, oh yeah, I've heard really good things about this. This weighs in at 11% ABV and 100 IBUS, so it should do the trick. And can we discuss how much I love the artwork on the label???

It slides into my glass, showing a medium amber color and with a moderate off-white head. The aroma is fantastic: pine, grapefruit, pineapple, orange, and just a hint of freshly-cut grass. Taking a sip, all of those flavors are unsurprisingly forward, but the lactose adds such an interesting note to this. It doesn't affect the flavor at all, it just smooths out the mouthfeel, so that it's soft, lush, and rich, kind of like drinking velvet. It's a sweeter hop bomb, but not offensively cloying, such as I find Ballast Point Sculpin and many lesser IPAs to be. There's a boozy note that comes through midway through the sip, and almost a burnt sugar note at the very back end, like the topping on a creme brulee. It's one of the most unique beers I've ever had, and I drink a lot of weird beers!

I've yet to have a bad beer from Three Floyds, and I love what they did with this. The label describes this beer as "not normal", and I'd definitely have to agree with them, yet they knocked this odd notion out of the ballpark.

4.7/5 caps

 -Jennie

This has had time to warm up.... a lot of time. Roughly 2 hours.... oops. Well, to be fair, we took an hour and a half break to hang out without neighbor, drink a Yuengling in memory of her uncle, and watch Drunk History. Which linking that reminds me how much I don't like our earlier reviews of beers. We've become more thorough, more expanded, more experienced, more drunk.

That being said, it shocks me that this still has a small amount of head lingering around, much like a small portion of a song that's stuck in your head for days, you know the tune and a couple words, but you're stubborn, so you're not going to look it up. But, damn, what is that!? Is it some 80's New Wave or something they played on the modern alt rock station last week? I seem to be getting sidetracked. So, the color on this was nailed by Jennie.  The aroma on this is.... hang on let's twist an Apocalypse Now reference " * Long Sniff* I love the smell of hops in the morning!" Pineapple, orange, grapefruit, and some hints grass (dig deep, it's faded at this point, same as the pine notes Jennie picked up earlier). Mind you, 2 hours into being poured, I still want to have a room in a house that smells like this, year round.

Time for another Apocalypse Now quote: "You'll never find out about yourself working in some fucking factory in Ohio." This beer makes me realize that in the first sip. My factory job (actually, yes, in Ohio) will never bring me to inner peace, finding my inner light. This beer, on the other hand, is closer than factory work. It's fantastic. There's a blast of grapefruit zest, pine and orange upfront, your mind expects this to intensify and linger, like most DIPAs, but instead, the malts come in and the lactose sugars pop in and mellow everything out, giving balance to something that otherwise would be overpowering. The hops do linger, but instead of intensifying, they dissipate as the smooth liquid slides from the lips and down the esophagus. There's some almost lemon like flavors from the hops at this point that blends perfectly with the caramel notes from the malt. The lactose sugars gives it a smooth mouthfeel, like laying naked on a comfy bed with velvet sheets on it. Moving your arms and legs, rejoicing in the sheer joy you get from it touching your skin. Picture that, but on your tongue. The finish is slightly sticky, but with this being 11% and 100 IBUs, I can't tell clearly which it is, as there is both hop and sweetness stickiness. 

If you're able to, pick this up, it's an experience. Who would have thought of adding lactose sugars to a DIPA? I never would have thought it would work with something so hoppy (I'm used to lactose sugars being in stouts). Well, shit, Three Floyds, you nailed it. I tip my hat to you, fine sirs (and possibly madames - Jennie).

4.8/5 caps

-Nathan-

Music pairings: "Ride of the Valkyries", Wagner, not only for the movie reference, but also for the way this beer blasts across the tongue
Cheese pairings: a good, local Farmer's cheese. Something nice and creamy.
Food pairings: Peach Crisp

Fat Heads Hop Juju

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 If you'll recall the nightmare that was attempting to obtain Founders KBS, Fat Heads Hop Juju was nearly as bad. In this case, the third time was, indeed the charm. Fat Heads has something of a cult following, and it's well earned. We are in love with their Head Hunter, so we're really looking forward to this, their Imperial IPA. (Fat Heads fans should also note that their Sunshine Daydream, a session IPA, is currently available at various locations in Columbus this week.)

This poured a medium caramel color with a lovely off-white head that quickly dissipated from atop this 9% ABV, 100 IBU behemoth. The aroma on this is pure bliss and immediately sent me to my happy place. Initially a huge blast of pine, this has had a few minutes to warm and has developed notes of caramel, citrus, lychee, mango, and guava. Oops, I totally just dunked my nose into my glass. It was completely worth it. After utterances of unbridled ecstasy (including supplications to deities I don't even believe in), let me try to describe how this tastes, besides completely amazing. There are notes of caramel, citrus, papaya, and the aforementioned lychee/mango/guava that dance on the tongue. It's perfectly balanced between hop bitterness and malty sweet. It's also fairly full and round in the mouth. Fully expect Nathan to offer praise and offerings to Hopsus.

We realize that we have drastically under-reviewed Fat Heads. We hope to change that soon.

5/5 caps. It's on par with a well-cared-for Hopslam or The Oracle. And from me, that's high praise.

-Jennie

Well, shit. How does one follow up such praise (without the mention of my own deity of Hopsus)? The way Jennie has hyped this up, it seems like all this was worth the hunt. The hunt involved 3 stores over a week.... finally, our awesome friends at Wine & Brew Emporium had it. Another reason I love them (side note: beer store reviews upcoming soon).

This has been hyped up here in the CBus area. A brewery from Cleveland with limited distribution here (we aren't able to obtain all their selections) that won Gold at the Great American Beer Festival for the Imperial IPA portion. Highly rated on those 'other' review site (Rate Beer and Beer Advocate), yeah, we needed this in/around our mouths.

The aroma is enough to summon Hopsus. We have whole leaf hops in the freezer that I'm thinking about putting in a circle around me while reviewing this. C'mon, the bottle states:
"The magical hops cast their spell, the natives chant and the drums beat. Witchcraft? Maybe just a little. Hop JuJu is a supernatural beer with "a reckless use of hops" creating aromas and flavors  of citrus, pine and tropical fruit with a juicy resiny hop finish. "
How can I not invoke Hopsus into this?!

So, as I listen to a local musician (Scott Gorsuch, who I recently met after a gig. We chatted over IPAs. You can find his music on Youtube), I dive my nose into this. Literally... I have some head on the tip of my nose now, as I want to be one with this aroma. Jennie nailed the aroma, "notes of caramel, citrus, lychee, mango, and guava," although I'm also picking up notes of pine that are lending themselves perfectly to this concoction. My first sip is.... hang on... I need to wipe up a pile of drool. Holy Hopsus! A nice caramel backbone takes presence before the giant juicy blast of hops. Citrus and tropical fruit take the forefront, making you forget all of life's worries and woes. A nice piney note rounds out the back end, reminding you this comes from the earth, and not another spiritual realm. This is definitely a sipping beer, as the 100 IBUs makes your mouth pucker in excitement for the next sip. Don't tease your taste buds, find this when you can and enjoy it.

5/5 caps

-Nathan-

Music Pairing: Hakuna Matata (Lion King... yup)
Cheese Pairing: Kerrygold Dublin Irish Cheddar
Food Pairing: Your favorite sushi roll, done spicy

Knee Deep Hoptologist

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Well, this has been a less-than-stellar winter so far, with me being too sick to review much good ole craft beer. Seriously, Mother Nature, wake the fuck up. We're ten days into spring and have now just had two good days. Sigh. That's not to say that we haven't been picking up and stashing a ton for later reviews, it's just that I've been too congested to really get a feel for the nuances of many beers. That is not to say that I've merely been drinking swill; nay, we've had plenty of good stuff recently.

So, remember how much we love love love Knee Deep Brewing??? Yeah, we almost forgot, too, until their brews hit the market again recently. They recently quintupled their production capacity, so now we can get more of their yummy brews. We attended a Knee Deep tasting recently, and discovered this as well as a couple of other treasures from this wonderful brewery. We chatted with the distributing rep for awhile and we learned that somewhere, somehow, this particular brew was rated better than Pliny the Elder in a blind side-by-side taste test. Hmmmm. This certainly piqued my interest. Let's see how it stacks up to some beers we can readily get here in Ohio.

It pours a deep golden color with a fluffy, light toffee-colored head. The aroma is grapefruit, malty sweetness, oranges, with a note of orange peel toward the back. Oh, and there's a hint of booze in the aroma. Yeah. Taking a sip, my taste buds are confronted by earthy flavors up front which yield quickly to bright citrus fruit flavors, which then fade out to pine needles toward the back end. There's a blast of grapefruit toward the middle and it sticks throughout the finish. There's a hit of caramel toward the middle from the extra malts that give this the oomph to be considered a Double IPA. Candidly, I recall this being much better and hoppier at the tasting than it is now. Don't get me wrong: it's a solid, tasty, delicious brew. It's well-balanced, let's say. It's just not quite as hoppy as I remember, and being the unabashed hop lover I am, I want the hops to come through just a tinge more than they do in this. The mouthfeel on this is just solid; that it's a well-balanced beer really comes through at every sip.

4.75/5 caps

-Jennie
 
Ah, Knee Deep. Many memories have been spent with your Hop Shortage, Simtra, and McCarthy's Bane. We've missed your distribution here in Ohio, but understand your need to expand. Apparently, since our last review of them (where we had a Knee Deep drought), they expanded to 4x their size, have a tap room and plan to expand to 16 states (instead of the previous 5). Good things are worth the wait. I emailed them recently to compliment them on their selections and to find out the background of their name. I was thinking it was drawn inspiration from the Funkadelic song "(Not Just) Knee Deep". Apparently I was far off. CEO Jerry Moore replied with "The short version of the answer is that "Knee Deep" refers to the depth of the snow one night in Reno when our Brewmaster was doing an 'all night' brew session."

As Jennie mentioned, we recently went to a tasting, and that's where we first tasted this 9%, 102 IBU behemoth. Talking with the distributor, who has a few bottles of Pliny at home, I asked him his personal preference between the two. He said they're both fantastic beers, but couldn't pick one. Fair enough. As someone who has never tasted Pliny (if you would like to send us a bottle to review, contact us), I have to take the word of mouth from others on this matter. Speaking of matter, I believe I'm supposed to review this.

This is a deep golden, almost amber color with some light head still sticking around. As this has had time to warm up, I'm catching grapefruit and citrus heavy on the nose with hints of sweetness from the malts. According to Knee Deep's website, this contains Cascade, Citra, Columbus, Magnum and Hersbrucker hops. The "C" hops come out heavy in the nose at this point. The first sip of this near room temp IPA is fantastic. Sweetness blending with citrus, tropical and grapefruit notes make the front fantastic. The middle is sweeter with the malt flavors (biscuit and caramel flavors). The finish is dry with a nice pine and grapefruit flavor to it. This drinks like a good IPA should, medium mouthfeel with decent carbonation, and a nice resiny stickiness that lingers.

Oh yes, Knee Deep, welcome back to our fridge.

4.9/5 caps

-Nathan-

Music Pairing: Funkadelic "(Not Just) Knee Deep" (I don't care about the real answer, this will always play in my head when I see your name)
Food Pairing: BBQ Pork
Cheese Pairing: Vermont Extra Sharp White Cheddar

Stone Brewing Company Stochasticity Grapefruit Slam IPA

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Clearly, I'm still in search of a great grapefruit IPA. I'm under the delusion that a) I'll be able to taste the grapefruit and the beer in general, and b) the vitamin C in the citrus plus the alcohol will be able to kill this ickiness that has taken over my body for nearly two weeks. This one is brought to us from Stone, and seems to be the first in a series of brews from them. This is a double IPA brewed with grapefruit peel. I'm definitely intrigued.

Aside from the wonderful bottle, which evokes Cold War-era high technology, this pours a medium amber with a fluffy eggshell-colored head that doesn't stick around too long. The aroma on this is interesting. It's not overly strong, yet there's a faint tinge of noticeable grapefruit, along with some freshly mowed grass and hay. I am not noticing any malt presence in the aroma, other than it smells slightly sweet. Taking a sip, it starts out with caramel and brown sugar from the malts, which then quickly fades into the bitterness of grapefruit peels. The finish on this is a bitter, dry bite. I wish they had used more zest than pith, which is where I think the bitterness is coming from, but it's also nicely cutting through the glue that is my throat right now. It's not overly grapefruit, but the grapefruit is definitely noticed, especially toward the back side. I'm not sure if there are more subtle notes that I'm missing; I'll let Nathan fill in any blanks.

Candidly, I kind of want to use this in a Netti pot. This is a good example of a grapefruit IPA. Stone, as usual, has yet to disappoint.

4.3/5 caps -- only because I wish I could get a full feel for this.

-Jennie

After letting this warm up, while she-with-lady-parts took lead on this review, the color remains the same (as it should) and there is still a bit of eggshell head struggling to hold on for dear life.  The aroma at this point is earthy, piney and grapefruit, as I'd expect from Stone. The flavor is interesting. It's a long interesting journey from start to finish. Biscuit malt at first, leading almost instantly into a brown sugar flavor while the hop flavors start making their presence known. There is some piney that leads into some grapefruit almost instantaneously. The grapefruit builds and builds to a nice bitterness while the oils start overtaking and giving a pleasant puckering to the mouth. At times there are hints of floral notes that pop in, but don't stick around long. The finish on this is nice and dry with a strong bitter bite (like Jennie said). There's a nice puckering oily finish that washes over everything on the backend.

Not my favorite beer by Stone (read: Dayman or Enjoy By), but damn good. A bitch to spell, a pleasure to drink. When your pint glass is done, your mouth will feel like you just ate a grapefruit (or drank a pint of grapefruit juice). Fantastic for those who love grapefruit.

And for those who are wondering, Webster's dictionary defines Stochastic as:

1

:  random; specifically :  involving a random variable <a stochastic process>

2

:  involving chance or probability :  probabilistic <a stochastic model of radiation-induced mutation>

So, randomly, this beer works. Thanks again to our friends at Wine and Brew for carrying this and for being stellar people in general.

4.5/5 caps

-Nathan- 

Music Pairing: Bullets and Octane "Pirates"

Cheese Pairing: Kerry Gold Irish Cheddar

Food Pairing: Reuben Poutine (yeah, that happened)